Long story short, 5th times a charm? eh eh?

“NO I DON’T WANT TO GO SHOPPING, I DON’T WANT NEW CLOTHES, NO!” Yes I have verbally spoken those words, sadly): Growing up with 2 brothers, an outdoorsy mom, a dad and a tomboy older sister, it closed me out from a so called “fashion world”. When their fashion consisted of zip-offs, Chaco’s, and sweatshirts, that’s all I knew there was. My parents had 4 boys total figuratively speaking. I rocked both of my brother’s hand me downs and looked good too, so I thought? I was always considered one of the boys or “butch”, I then decided to dress the part as well. It was not until the end of my junior year of high school, and summer of 2012, I decided to embrace the fact I am a girl. I’ve always wanted to know why boys were not infatuated with me, like they were with the other girls. I then went through the scary phase of “dressing like I need attention” however that’s another story for another time.
I started buying magazines, watching gossip girl… for the drama, duh, I basically taught myself what I thought I should know. There is definitely more to fashion than people think. It could take hours to figure out my outfit, or stuff my brain with what’s in and what’s trending now. However after reading multiple articles, books and quotes, the one and only Coco Chanel made an impact on my life with her famous quote, “Fashion Fades, Only Style Remains. I agreed, I did not need to buy all the clothes in the world to be able to know fashion; I just needed to know how to put an outfit together, even if that meant re-wearing clothes. Next step that I thought was appropriate was, actually purchasing clothes and make-up. I NEVER wore make-up until this happened, self-teaching is how this played out. Learning how clothes should fit on my body and what was flattering on my petite yet curvy, figure. It was a little interesting at first because I overloaded on the foundation, eyeliner and cleavage. You live and you learn though, which I definitely learned and I a very appreciative towards that to this day.
You know when people say they have “gifts” or an “eye” for whatever their interest or talent is, well I was blessed with an eye for fashion. That did not come to my attention until about the middle of my senior year of high school. I understood how fabric should drape on your body, how it should accentuate certain areas and what looks flattering. My world then blossomed, like the first flower on a beautiful spring day. My first dilemma occurred, for my “love for fashion”. Reason being; my parents were not going to buy me new clothes every day or spend money like there’s no tomorrow on me. After all, being 17 years young at the time, I decided to get have my own income, thus, I could buy as many clothes I wanted, which meant; expanding my horizon. Hallelujah!!
At the end of my senior year I had no idea what I was going to do for college, weather that’s to go or what. I only applied to one school(my mistake) and was not very smart on my school of choice. I later on found out fashion school was an actual thing. However when I saw those prices for tuition and boarding, I was shocked. I had no idea fashion school was that pricey? With lots of prayers, friends’ opinions who have attended fashion school, visitations and patients, I knew that’s where I should spend my tuition money. That being said, I officially applied to Fashion Institute of Technology Fall2014 in good ol’ Manhattan, New York. I was way ahead of myself, did not prepare and received The letter of being denied, not to mention it was my 4th letter of denial from a college I applied at. My heart broke and I was crushed, at that point I had no idea what I was going to do, I lacked so much self-confidence by then. However, I continued to blog, post on social media, and keep up with fashion events and important information. 1 year later, I booked a flight to New York City with my sister and her friend, actually visited the school and took a peek into the NY life. I fell in love instantly, crying, happy tears of course, while landing in LaGuardia airport. I set up a meeting with FIT admissions for a portfolio preview day and everything went great.
I am re-applying, though you may ask why? Because I am not going to let one letter of denial stop me. I do not give up that easy, thus applications are due Nov 1,2014… patience is seriously a virtue. This will be my 2nd time applying to this school and again with a lot of praying, obeying, thinking, investing my time, money and making my portfolio look as good as it can get, I believe I have a strong chance of getting in this year. It’s been about 3 years since I’ve been interested into fashion but only about 2 ½ I have been so incredibly passionate about it.
However… we will see what happens and where my next stop is going to be. It may not even be FIT, I could get denied again, I could get in I have no idea. All I know is, His timing is always right, He knows what is best for me and He is in control. I would love to get the show on the road and finally do or go somewhere with fashion. Not just post pictures on Instagram, Pinterest or blogging anymore. I want to go the next level; I am in my prime years and want a chance, finally. Thus, self-teaching everything I need to know, literally everything I want to show someone I have what it takes, the motivation, drive, passion, skill and love for this particular career. My patience, have been tested at times for this particular desire and dream, but I am not going to quit until it happens. I realized if you are so genuinely passionate about what you want to do, it is going to happen. Not in a snap of finger, because great things do not come easy, great things take time.
Big City Dreamer


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