Boys or Men?

Who needs boys? Exactly, a man is what us girls should be looking for. If you are looking for a boy to date, you’re probably too young too date then(; I have been here for 19 years so far, surrounded by couples and a remarried parent. My mom is still waiting for that God loving, outdoor man though. Anyways this is about my life not my mother!

I had those stupid flings in high school even though I was a “hottie” tomboy, I somehow was still able to snag a few boys along my teen years. I had that one boy who I was crushing so hard on and he knew I was wrapped around his finger. Definitely had my heart involved in that one, however you live and you learn. Learning experience: check that off the list. I was all over different high schools, I loved making new friends and people knew me. I “dated” about 2 guys total, different times obviously but all from different schools. I had this image in my head of whom I wanted to date, so when that boy gave me attention I pictured what I had in my head in this boy. I was more mature then most kids my age in some areas. I knew dating was for marriage, but I did not believe in marriage because my parents divorced and never new what marriage actually was. I dated boys who met my requirements, my standards and anything else I had on my list of expectations. If they did not meet my requirements I would dump them by the end of two weeks. It was a rule I had come up with, I would get to know them understand their intentions and by the second week I would see if I could tolerate them… #sorrynotsorry. Plus it’s high school nothing ever serious actually happens. Thinking that was not starting off any relationship well, but immature me, I thought it was mature. I knew what I wanted and thinking I could be the girl that changes that boy because getting the good ones are too easy. (Thanks Lauren Conrad) Anyways, I am now 19 and have a pretty good head on my shoulders. I know dating is meant for marriage, having standards is needed and a checklist is fine. However if they do not meet them all, does not mean they aren’t good enough just means they don’t meet them. Everyone I see around me had a significant other, married, engaged or has a boyfriend/girlfriend. It is so frustrating because I don’t get why I cannot find someone? Am I looking too hard? Am I called to singleness? Am too weird? Am I ugly? All these lies start to come to surface and I believe them. I re-think, wait that is not of God. I am pretty (not cocky, confident) also everyone is beautiful I believe. I am my own kind of weirdness and it just is not my time. Relationships take a lot of work and needed to have a solid foundation is a number 1 priority you should have before engaging yourself into something that could be life changing. For the love of carbs, girls you do not get your identity from a boy or human being!!! Your world should not be his world or revolve around him! You should find your identity in Jesus. If that boy is your world and your world will be crushed after your relationship ends, you have idolized him and we believers are not to have any other idols but Jesus. Sorry rant… I am just very passionate about that topic. Anyways, I believe and know Jesus has my husband out there already; He is just waiting for the perfect moment for him to come into my life. I have to remind myself, I am only 19 years old!! I have my whole life ahead of me, I haven’t even started my career yet, I can barely financially support myself and I don’t have a legit job. Me wanting to be responsible, I want to live the life I was called to live, enjoy the single life right now and not worry about a boy. My life is just starting and I want to enjoy it (: If that means I don’t have a boyfriend, which is ok with me! I believe that you should not date because everyone else is dating or date because you are lonely, those are the worst excuses and those relationships do not last! I know from experience. Don’t let others influence you in that way, you do you!! Enjoy the time you have by yourself because once you are married, no more alone time. You’ll always have your hubby and you can’t just dump him, avoid him or ignore him. Why? Because you are married and you’ll be too in love to be that mean.


Big City Dreamer


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